CRT for HOTD: Sheepstealer Recaps 'House of the Dragon,' S3, E01
Sheepstealer joins ContrabandCamp's series exploring the HOTD Cinematic Universe from the perspective of the marginalized people in the Seven Kingdoms
Each week, ContrabandCamp’s CRT for HOTD will recap HBO’s “House of the Dragon” from the perspective of marginalized groups in the HOTD cinematic universe.
Today, Sheepstealer joins us to discuss “Salt and Sea, Fire and Blood,” the debut episode of season 3.
CONTRABANDCAMP: Thank you for joining us. Before we begin, let me ask: Should I call you Sheep? Sheepstealer? Mr. Stealer?
SHEEPSTEALER: First of all, Sheepstealer is my slave name.
My real name is Veal N. Flames of House Dragon Fire, King of the Cookout, the goat-getter’s GOAT, Baddest of Breaths, Starter of Fire, Thrower of Flames, the Hottest Mouth in the South, Microwaver of Men, Wanter of Smoke, the Flyest Air Fryer in the Seven Kingdoms.
People in the streets call me “Young Torch, the Fiyah-God.”
CONTRABANDCAMP: No they don’t.
SHEEPSTEALER: OK, you can call me Sheepstealer.
CONTRABANDCAMP: OK, Mr. Stealer.
Episode 1 opened with Rhaena Targaryen finding you in a valley. Tell us about your life before you met Rhaena.
SHEEPSTEALER: As you know, I was always the black sheep of dragons, hahahahahahaha… Damn, I love puns!
Seriously, though, my story began 5,000 years ago when my great-great-great-grandfather, Tyran O. Saurus, met a fly-ass chick named Terry Dactyl. Their children were born in a volcano, which started the royal dynasty that ruled our motherland...
Until the Valyrians showed up.
These unmelanated, white-haired colonizers invaded our homeland and enslaved our people. Although they claim to be great warriors who “claimed” dragons and conquered the Seven Kingdoms, my people have always resisted! Unfortunately, a few of us have been so brainwashed that they will let these pale-faced mount them.
Not me.
I refuse to bow down to these ride supremacists. That’s why I escaped the Targaryen plantation and settled in the Vale. I just want the colonizers to stay off my back.
Get it? Off. My. Back.
Come on. That was funny.
CONTRABANDCAMP: Not really.
But if you hate humans, why did you let Rhaena Targaryen claim you?
SHEEPSTEALER: First of all, I never said I hate humans. I have compassion for all living things. So when I saw her walking through the valley of the shadow of sheep death, I wanted to help. I didn’t even know humans came in that shade! She had natural hair and was already precooked! I knew I could trust her as soon as she uttered her first words.
Her breath smelled just like a dragon’s!
CONTRABANDCAMP: Were you concerned about getting involved in an interracial relationship?
