• Capitalism

• Authoritarianism

• White supremacy

• Artificial intelligence

In a world that seems increasingly divided, we’ve finally found one area in which the smartest, wealthiest and most powerful people on the planet unanimously agree:

Artificial intelligence is going to murder us.

In the past 48 hours alone, some of the world's most esteemed sci…

Read more

Read more

Meeting with adversaries, in and of itself, is not my problem.

I am a lawyer. Just this week I spent hours negotiating with representatives of the county that killed one of my clients. Sometimes you have to sit across from people you fundamentally disagree with because your clients or your community need something from them. But I do not enter those rooms just to say I was there. There is a demand. There is an objective. And ultimately, there needs to be a result for the people I represent.

That is the standard I thought about when I learned that House Democratic Leader Hakeem Jeffries sat down privately in New York with President Donald Trump’s son-in-law and close adviser Jared Kushner. Jeffries defended the meeting as the “reality of governance”.

My questions for Jeffries are simple: What did the American people get? What did Black people get? What concession was won? What became materially different because the meeting happened?

Those questions matter because Democratic leaders, including Jeffries, have spent years warning that Donald Trump and the MAGA movement threaten our rights and institutions, while also accusing Trump, his family, and Kushner of corruption, influence peddling, and potentially unlawful conduct.

And those questions become even more important when you compare Democratic leadership’s willingness to engage people close to Trump with how quickly parts of the Democratic establishment become cautious when someone inside their own party wins power without the establishment’s blessing.

Look at Florida State Rep. Angie Nixon. Nixon pulled off a decisive upset in Florida’s Democratic U.S. Senate primary, defeating establishment favorite Alexander Vindman despite being outspent roughly 16 to 1. The candidate with the money, national profile and institutional advantages lost to the candidate who organized enough actual voters to win. If Nixon wins in November, she will become Florida’s first Black U.S. senator.

Democratic Senate leadership did publicly congratulate her. Chuck Schumer and Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee Chair Kirsten Gillibrand released a statement after her victory. Obviously they should have, but still that matters. Yet, statements of congratulations are not campaign resources, field infrastructure, advertising dollars, national surrogates or sustained political investment.

Read more

Any examination of social injustice, economic disparities or racial discrimination eventually reaches the point where the examiner will blame inequality on one of three culprits:

1. White supremacy

2. Capitalism

3. Conquering

I’m sure you’ve heard of white supremacy. It’s been doing its thing for a while. The “career highlights” section of white supremacy’s resumé includes race-based slavery, Jim Crow and the current president of the United States. Anyone who cites white supremacy as the source of America’s woes is not necessarily wrong.

Conversely, any vegan who has ever paired a Che Guevara T-shirt with vegan Birkenstocks will tell you that white supremacy is just a byproduct of capitalism. According to Bernie Sanders, many Black intellectuals and left-leaning, colorblind “it’s-class–not-race” warriors, capitalism is the real supervillain. And, in many ways, they’re correct. In a nation whose structure was built atop a foundation of racial hierarchy, white supremacy might be the most American form of class division.

Then, there are these people:

I’m sure you’ve heard someone whitesplain away inequality, injustice and violence by noting that they shouldn’t be castigated just because their forefathers were good at “conquering” other lands, cultures and people. And, in all fairness, they have a point. After all, to the victor go the spoils. That’s how history has always worked. And if you don’t like capitalism, white supremacy or being conquered, go back to…oh, wait, their ancestors conquered that continent, too.

What if everybody is wrong?

What if capitalism is not that bad? What if socialism has the same problems? Every society has its own unique social flaws; what if white supremacy is just a uniquely American glitch in the system we built? What if we are just one collective casualty in the long history of conquerors?

No matter which of these theories you believe, there’s only one thing that white supremacists, capitalists, every failed socialist experiment and history’s greatest conquerors all have in common:

What if it’s white people?

Today’s Reading List

• How Redlining Shaped Black America by Michael Harriot and Felice Léon

• The Medieval Empire of Ghana by A. J. H. Goodwin

• The Clapback by Michael Harriot

• The Agrarian Origins of Capitalism by Ellen Meiksins Wood

• Will He Lynch Letter: How White People Were Invented by Michael Harriot

Thank you, , , , , , and many others for tuning in to my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.

Get more from Michael Harriot in the Substack app

Available for iOS and Android

Get the app

• Candidate Opposes U.S.-Backed Genocide of Palestinians but Still Supports Jewish People and Israel’s Right to Exist

• Officer Shoots Unarmed Man Who Attacked Him, According to Details of Uncorroborated Police Report We Didn’t Bother to Verify

• Despite Claims of Pundits and People Who Struggle With Math, Election Data Shows N…

Read more

Walter 1.0 was crazy

Four score and seven years before Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez announced the official end to the fleeting fad of giving a fuck about Black people, “the musical genius known as Walter Boyd” shared a piece of advice that would go down in the annals of Black-American history:

Avoid white people. All of them. They are no…

Read more

For years, the trope of the indestructible, hyper-resilient Black woman has persisted in nearly every form of popular culture. The trope is so pervasive that many people believe it to be fact.

So when you look at Rep. LaMonica McIver (D-N.J.), you…

Read more

As much as I believe in Black excellence and our potential to achieve on the highest levels, there is a difference between a first-ballot hall-of-famer like Clarence Thomas and a Team Wypipo all-star like Candace Owens. Jason Whitlock might be one of this generation’s finest practitioners of delusional self-hate. But Whitlock pales in comparison to Alan Keyes, who was a genuine crazy person. Thomas Sowell can’t even hold Condoleezza Rice’s jockstrap.

That’s why we need a coon classification system.

While “coon” is often used as a pejorative to describe Black people who participate in anti-Blackness, before it was weaponized by social media, the term was used for jigging at the highest level. Discussing this topic with nuance and insight requires a system that distinguishes between Black conservatives and the people who Harriet Tubman would’ve shot.

That’s why ContrabandCamp created the Yes Massa Matrix—the first-of-its-kind ranking template that identifies the difference between house negroes and those of the “bitch-ass” variety.

Here are the six kinds of coons, ranked from low to lowest.

6. Suspect

In Black vernacular, “suspect” is an adjective used to describe someone whose behavior warrants a healthy dose of side-eye. You can’t quite put your finger on it, but there’s something about them that makes your nigga senses tingle. Maybe it’s his lineup that screams Supercuts. Sometimes, it’s a co-worker who always goes to your white supervisor whenever there’s a problem in the department you lead.

These are the people that know about the cookout but never come. If they show up, just fix them a plate and keep an eye on them. And never let your guard down around them. I’m not saying they’ll snitch; I’m just saying they’re suspect. So just to be sure…

Don’t tell them about the slave revolt.

Famous people who are/were suspect: William O’Neal, Hakeem Jeffries, Drake fans, Peter the Apostle (before the cock crowed three times), Black men with no facial hair, Drake.

5. Grifters/Sellouts

The great thing about sellouts is that they openly acknowledge whose side they’re on. Grifters know they’re wrong but are willing to align themselves with anti-Blackness if the check has enough zeroes.

And, contrary to popular belief, money is not the sole reason why grifters sell out. Some do it for power. Others are motivated by the proximity to power. And sometimes, it's simply for the perception of safety and financial security that whiteness affords them.

There are sellouts under indictment right now who sold their vote to Donald Trump for a $1,226 stimmy and a PPP loan they never intended to pay back. Candace Owens believed in racial justice (and edges) before selling her soul to Charlie Kirk’s anti-woke TPUSA. Now that her benefactor is dead, she’s slowly making her way home. Shortly before killing police reform, Tim Scott told me personally that he believes “there’s racism in America” and “pockets of racism in police departments.”

Famous grifters: Judas. People who still shop at Target. Daniel Cameron. Nicki Minaj. Sheriff David Clarke. Van Jones. Terrence Williams.

4. Sucka

Whatever happened to suckas?

Whether it was an official correspondence to Carlton Ridenhour from the government, the musician known as the “King of Rock n Roll” or just a mediocre emcee, there was a time when being a sucka was one of the worst things a person could be. In fact, one could argue that labeling a run-of-the-mill “nigga,” with the s-word was worse than calling them a B.A.N.

Here is the difference between a sucka and a sellout:

A sellout is a grifter who is willing to abandon their personal ethics in exchange for financial reward. A sucka is someone whose integrity has always been compromised. Their moral compasses are perpetually pointed in the direction of whiteness because suckas are essentially lames who fell for it. Not only do they align themselves with anti-Blackness, they actually believe the narratives they promote.

Jay-Z doesn’t just rap about the redemptive power of capitalism; he truly believes that money will save us. In 2014, when America had a Black president, a Black attorney general and the highest Black voter turnout in history, I met an ESPN employee who was advocating for Black people to vote Republican.

By all accounts, Stephen A. Smith truly believes everything he says. And sure, his conservative beliefs probably benefit him financially. But that doesn’t necessarily mean he’s grifting. It’s entirely possible, perhaps even likely, that Smith is not a sellout.

Maybe he’s just a sucka.

Famous suckas: Black capitalists. Floyd Mayweather. 63% of rappers. People who believe in the “Democratic Plantation.” Ben Carson. Waka Flocka. Herschel Walker.

3. House Negro

Some Black people love whiteness more than white people do.

House negroes don’t just love their country; their patriotism, religion and moral values are in direct opposition to Blackness. They believe kneeling down during the national anthem is akin to shitting on the grave of the founders. They don’t want white people to feel bad, so they don’t mind banning CRT. Whenever someone talks about police brutality, they ask why we don’t believe that “all lives matter.”

I could go on, but someone has already explained the phenomenon perfectly:

Famous house negroes: Condoleezza Rice. People who point out that “all lives matter.” Byron Donalds. Anyone who criticizes the Koch Brothers but not AIPAC. Tiger Woods. Thomas Sowell. People who criticized Black people for “disrespecting the memory of Charlie Kirk.” Paris Dennard. Pastor Mark Burns.

2. Coon

Coons do it for the white man.

While every group on this list loves basking in the blinding glow of caucasity, Coons have a special gear that is specifically reserved for the white gaze. What separates them from their peers is their niggerosity. Instead of acting, dressing and talking like white people, they entertain white audiences with a performative version of Blackness.

They don’t just talk loud; they talk louder than loud Black people. They don’t just dance; they furiously shuck; they jive with the desperation of a thousand jigaboos. By stepping, fetching and throwing around Black slang, they demonstrate their authenticity and prove their negro street cred. And by doing so, they validate the caricature of Black people that only exists in the white imagination.

Famous coons: Azealia Banks. Charleston White. Black men who only date white girls because white women are “submissive.” Officer Brandon Tatum. Jesse Lee Peterson. Diamond and Silk. Big Groove.

1. Boomerangs

The most dangerous animal in the coon kingdom is the Black person who attacks Black people more than they attack white supremacy.

Usually this person’s Black liberation ideology is often so far left that it has circled back around to anti-Blackness. And because they are more invested in themselves than the Black community writ large, they began hating anyone who doesn’t fully agree with them. If you believe in reparations, but not their specific version, they count you as an enemy. If you voted for Kamala Harris but criticized her silence on Israel, you might as well be MAGA to a boomerang. Conversely, if you voted for Kamala Harris in spite of her stance on Israel, you hate Palestinians and are supporting a genocide. If you don’t care if trans women play sports, you are part of the gay agenda that is destroying Black families. If you are a Bible-believing Christian, you are following a white man’s religion.

These people are opps.

While their rhetoric and their performative radicalism might be pro-Black, they have adopted the ideological ways of whitefolk. They might truly believe they give a fuck about Black issues, but the result of their vehement fanaticism is just as destructive an impediment to Black liberation as a top-tier coons. They hate Black moderates. They hate Black Christians and Black atheists and Black feminists and Black scholars and people who haven’t read Du Bois and the “talented tenth” and Booker T. Washington and people who wear bonnets and capitalism and white liberal ideology and everyone and everything that doesn’t fit their narrow definition of what freedom looks like…

Just like white people.

Famous boomerangs: Black Americans who are anti-immigrant. Briahna Joy Gray. Black immigrants who think they’re better than Black Americans. Tariq Nasheed. Black Bernie Bros. who are still mad. People who escaped the Democratic Plantation. Democrats who whine about Democratic Socialists. DSA members who criticize Black Democrats.

Today’s Reading List:

• The 7 Kinds of Kanye by Michael Harriot

• The Real Story of Black Martha’s Vineyard by Genelle Levy

• The Uncle Conundrum by Michael Harriot

• Did Kamala Harris’s Silence on Gaza Cost Her the White House? by Ta-Nehisi Coates

Thank you, , , , , , and many others for tuning in to my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.

Get more from Michael Harriot in the Substack app

Available for iOS and Android

Get the app

Sometimes it’s hard to believe that I’m nearly 50 years old. While I have a few more years to go before hitting that major life landmark, the reflection has already begun. Yes, a lot of that reflecting happens around life and my place in it, but if I’m being completely honest, I spend a lot more time thinking about the music that has shaped me as a man, husband, father, Southerner and how those things that helped craft my identity decades ago (egads!!!!) impact who I am today.

What’s most interesting is that despite the tremendous amount of music I’ve consumed over the past, say, 35-plus years that I’ve been an active, intentional music and hip-hop head, only a handful of albums truly stand out as being central and essential to my life’s story. In no particular order (and by no means exhaustive), De La Soul’s de la soul is dead, Erykah Badu’s Mama’s Gun, Res’ How I Do, DJ Quik’s Safe+Sound, Jay-Z’s Reasonable Doubt, Jodeci’s Diary of A Mad Black Band, etc. have all had a significant impact in shaping how I view the world. But it was Outkast’s ATLiens, released on Aug. 27, 1996—30 years ago—that truly helped me discover my hip-hop self, the version of me I know the most intimately, that I cherish the most deeply and that I believe in with the most passion.

Yes, that’s a lot of weight to put on an album, especially one made by two 21-year-olds. But everything about ATLiens opened my eyes and ears to who I could be. I’d argue that it did the same for others, but we’ll get there. Let’s start at the beginning.

Read more

I remember the first time I saw her. I was a little girl, and there she was on Hee Haw, those dimples, those big clear eyes, that voice like sunlight through a screen door. My mama always had country music playing in our house, but the second a Dolly Parton song came on, I stopped wha…

Read more

When NABJ awarded Smith its Thumbs Down Award, he defended himself by calling it a “smear job.” The popular ESPN host claimed his colleagues were “engaging in personal attacks.” Smith also insinuated that the organization violated one of the cardinal principles of his profession.

But a series of texts between Smith and a fellow NABJ member appear to unde…

Read more

I don’t believe in dead people.

While I don’t believe in ghosts, I also don’t believe that a person’s soul, presence and energy dissipate into the ether when their heart stops beating. I doubt my ancestors are spending their afterlives in the attics of Victorian mansions, pushing vases off white people’s mantelpi…

Read more

Before Occupy Wall Street, before the Bernie Sanders campaign, before all the heckling against “the one percent,” the op-eds on wealth inequality and the sold-out “Stop Oligarchy” tours, Chris Rock’s surreal 2001 comedy Pootie Tang brazenly—if bizarrely—foretold of an America in the thrall of a ruthless, racist plutocracy.

Long before mainstream economics and journalism offered a critique of concentrated corporate power, Pootie Tang portrayed capitalists as monopolistic syndicates shilling cigarettes, fast food, malt liquor, rat poison, switchblades and children’s “pork-chunk cereal” through the evil firm, the Lector Corporation. Bizarre as it may seem, stories like this would soon headline the publications of America’s storied news organizations.

Decades after the film’s release, books like Walt Bogdanich and Michael Forsythe’s When McKinsey Comes to Town: The Hidden Influence of the World’s Most Powerful Consulting Firm exposed how a single firm like McKinsey turbo-charged the opioid crisis, ICE detention, youth vaping, mass layoffs, authoritarian governments, cigarette sales and carbon pollution. In retrospect, Pootie’s portrayal of corporations’ ghoulish despotism was always fact, not fiction.

The strange reality is this—when stalwart institutions of American society refused to interrogate the structure of power and the economy, when the world’s most dominant firms and entrepreneurs were accruing unbelievable influence, it was oftentimes only in Black satirical art that one could see popular criticisms of the dangers of oligarchy.

Read more

As a warning, “gone ‘head now” ranks right up there alongside timeless pieces of verbal caution tape such as “I ain’t gonna tell you no more” and “I’m finna go to my car; don’t be here when I get back.” Not only does “gone ‘head now” give the listener the opportunity to apologize for their misdeeds or atone for their actions, but it also serves as a preliminary injunctive order. No matter what offense you have committed, if someone who lives within spitting distance of a ditch bank presents you with the “gone ‘head now” option, take it. Now.

Or not.

My first gon’ head encounter was with my cousin Derrick, who we called “Geet” (Look, I don’t know either. That’s not how Black nicknames work). He was a couple of years older than me, and he could fight. I’ve never actually seen Geet fight. I’ve never even heard a story about him fighting. No one has ever even told me that Geet was good at fighting. But anyone who ever met Geet would immediately understand that he could scrap. He just gave off “this nigga can fight” vibes. With Geet, the fighting ability was implied.

I didn’t believe it.

I didn’t necessarily disbelieve the “Geet’ll whip that ass” mythology. But as an unbiased observer who operates on facts and data, I had no visual evidence or firsthand testimony of my cousin’s fisticuffian expertise. So I refused to fall for the “Geet got hands.” I was a Geet skeptic. Of course, I understood the hazards of testing my cousin’s fighting ability in a real-world situation, so I didn’t fuck around with Geet, just in case. I basically just treated him like a cousin…

Until the Dookiehead Affair.

If you’re expecting an extremely hilarious story with juvenile twists and turns, I’m sorry. This one was simple. A bird shat on Geet’s head. That’s it. We were standing in the backyard with our cousins and a few other boys from the neighborhood when, suddenly, doo doo was on Geet’s head. And face. And probably on his lips.

We didn’t see it fall from the sky. It just magically appeared out of nowhere. One second, Geet was standing there; the next, his high-top fade had an avian whipped-cream topping. We didn’t even notice it until he put his hand on his head and yelled: “A bird dookied on me.”

Now, here is where my Geet agnosticism should have kicked in, because literally no one laughed. They just stood there staring at my fecal-faced cousin as if having pigeon poop spontaneously appear on your head was an everyday occurrence. Looking back, this is when I should have known that Geet could fight, because they just stood there as if sometimes it rains, sometimes it snows, and sometimes, God opens up the windows of heaven and pours a little butt juice on his beloved children.

Oh, how I guffawed!

Just as the universe showered down caca on my cousin, the gods of roasting hit me with a thunderous horde of doo-doo-related whimsy. I tomfooled. I buffooned. I shenanigged and shenniganed. “I knew you had shit for brains!” I rejoiced. “You got some dookie on your lips. That must be the early bird they were talking about. Does it taste like worms? ”

By the time he had reached the “gone ‘head,” I was in the zone. “How do you know it wasn’t semen?” I asked. “What if you’re pregnant? Can you get pregnant in the mouth? What you gonna name the birdmouth baby? Look on the bright side: Aunt Linda ain’t never gonna have to buy no eggs!”

By this time, people were slowly backing away as if my Bruce Banner was about to turn into the “‘credible Hulk” (which is what we called him in South Carolina). Theoretically, I knew my cousin had reached his breaking point. But I was too far in my bag. So when Geet affixed a “now” to his third and final “gone head,” I still had one piece of my seemingly infinite jest that just had to be released:

“Oh my God, I just realized something,” I said with all the awe and wonder I could muster.

“CHICKEN LITTLE WAS RIGHT!”

Bloop.

My cousin Geet punched me right in the mouth. I can only thank my mother for making sure I got my daily recommended dose of calcium because I have no idea how my teeth didn’t fall out. I didn’t even know teeth could ache—not the nerves in my gums and mouth, but the individual molars, incisors and canines. I truly believe the Dookiehead Affair is why I’m one of the few adults who didn’t need dental surgery. My cousin knocked the wisdom out of my teeth when I was 10.

But Geet didn’t stop there; he tuned me up real good. I punched back aimlessly, but it was no use. He didn’t even talk or say, “Take that!” He just surgically whipped the wisecracks out of me.

Y’all, my cousin Geet can fight!

When I stumbled into the house all bloody-nosed and sore-toothed, my mom and grandmama immediately began screaming. Was I lynched by the Klan? Had our neighborhood become gang-infested? Were mountain lions native to South Carolina? Because, obviously, there was a tiger involved.

“I told him to leave me ‘lone, Aunt Dot,” my cousin Geet said nonchalantly.

“Shole did,” my snitching sister Sean chimed in, superchalantly. “Geet said ‘gone head now’ three times.”

“Well, you can’t start a fire and then whine about getting burned,” my mama said, returning to washing dishes. “If you soak that shirt in the sink, the blood might come…"

“Wait, Geet,” my mom said quizzically. “What in the world is that white stuff in your hair?”

I didn’t say a word.

See?

Sometimes, violence is the answer.

This story is about Stephen A. Smith.

Today’s Reading List

• Algorithms of Oppression by Safiya Umoja Noble

• Your phone isn’t secretly listening to you, but the truth is more disturbing by Rich Haridy

• NABJ did the white thing by Michael Harriot

Thank you, , , , , , and many others for tuning into my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.

Get more from Michael Harriot in the Substack app

Available for iOS and Android

Get the app

Happy Black August, y’all.

Tuesday night, state Rep. Angie Nixon won the Democratic nomination for U.S. Senate in Florida. Her opponent had raised $16 million. Nixon had raised just under a million.

She won by double digits anyway.

I’m not going to stand here in Black August and pretend November will be easy. She’s facing an incumbent with real money, in a state where the GOP holds a real registration edge, in a state Democrats have treated like a lost cause for a generation. The road ahead is steep, and it deserves to be named honestly, not waved away. But steep roads and closed doors are not the same thing. This campaign has already handed us something we needed regardless of how November turns out.

Three lessons. Let’s get into them.

Read more

Did your therapist get her “doctorial” from the Kevin Samuel School for High Value Women?

Is your life coach on TikTok explaining why wearing a bonnet to class is a form of self-care?

Introducing the ContrabandCamp Clinic for Actual Psychology!

Whether it’s online trolls, uninformed …

Read more

On Monday, the Trump administration quietly solved America’s systemic racism problem.

The Associated Press reports:

How many women hold executive-level positions at top U.S. companies? What is the racial and ethnic breakdown of those roles? What is the gender and racial breakdown of the lowest-paid roles at those companies?

The Trump administrati…

Read more

Touring across 19th-century Europe and the United States, the legendary author and orator Frederick Douglass drafted jokes to draft audiences into the roiling war against slavery. A revolutionary entertainer, Douglass made his audiences laugh until their sides hurt so that they would side with the moral crusade for abolitionism.​

In his…

Read more

On Saturday Night, the National Association of Black Journalists bestowed its annual Thumbs Down Award to FCC Chairman Brendan Carr, CBS News, Circle City Broadcasting/WISH-TV CEO DuJuan McCoy, the Washington Post and this guy:

Read more